


Say What You Need to Say

by gnomi



Category: Glee, Sports Night
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-19
Updated: 2013-11-19
Packaged: 2018-01-02 02:01:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1051224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gnomi/pseuds/gnomi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>National news affects two different couples on a very similar personal level</p>
            </blockquote>





	Say What You Need to Say

**Author's Note:**

> When Jason Collins came out, I knew it would have relevance for two separate -- some might say disparate -- pairings that I hold dear. For Kurt and Blaine, it would show that their dreams of a better world may not be out of reach within their lifetimes. But for Dan and Casey, it would resonate completely differently. I realize that these two fandoms have little to no overlap (it would not surprise me to find that wintry-mix and I are the only people who know both fandoms), but it was a story that I could not tell without showing the impact of Jason Collins’ act of bravery on both.

"And while it pains me to say it, the Red Sox are having their best start in over a decade. Let's see if it holds up through the season. Casey?"

The toss from Dan was smooth, but Casey still wasn't sure he was completely prepared for what he was about to say.

"With the indulgence of our Executive Producer…" At this, Casey darted his eyes toward Dana, who was standing right out of camera range. She nodded, and he continued, "a brief statement."

Casey was nervous, despite all his years in broadcasting. But this was a big moment, even if it wasn't really about them, about the sports media. It _was_ about them, in a way. And that was why he wanted to do this, even if it was making his fingers tremble slightly against the anchor desk.

Under the desk, Dan moved his foot to touch Casey's, and feeling this, Casey could power through his nerves. He quickly riffled one last time through the script in front of him, looked at the camera, and started to speak.

"Earlier this week, Sports Illustrated published an article by Jason Collins…"

***  
Blaine scrambled to press pause on the DVR remote. Burt turned his head toward the stairs, knowing that Kurt was in his room sorting through items he might take back to New York.

"Kurt! Hey, Kurt! Come down here!"

Within seconds, Kurt was running down the stairs. "Dad? Everything OK?" While the news that morning at the doctor's had elated the whole family, they all were still a bit twitchy.

"Yeah, kid. Everything's fine. You…you're gonna want to hear this."

Kurt looked at the Sports Night logo on the screen and then back at his dad in disbelief. "You know I don't do sports, and I definitely don't do shows that talk about sports."

"This you will want to hear. Trust me," Blaine said. He rewound by 30 seconds and then let the show play.

***  
"Jason Collins will be known forevermore as the first active American professional sports player to come out of the closet."

Casey knew that Dan was making a face offscreen at "forevermore"; they'd argued about it in the shower that morning. Dan thought it sounded too Edgar Allen Poe, but Casey had argued that it had gravitas.

"I am proud to be living in a time in which a man in professional sports can be true to himself without fearing for his safety."

He knew that while it might not register to the average viewer, there were those who would immediately recognize that line as the statement of privilege that it was.

***  
Blaine tensed and stole a glance at Kurt, hoping he was hearing the positives in McCall's words along with the negatives.

"Wait… hang on. Pause," Kurt said, all clipped words and tight tone. Blaine did, trying not to guess what Kurt was reacting to.

When the TV went silent, Kurt turned to his dad and Blaine. "So, wait. Someone in professional sports just came out?"

"Yeah," Burt said. "Collins plays for the Wizards, though he was a Celtics player before that -- basketball."

"But I thought some football players came out a couple of years ago…?"

"There were a couple, but they were all retired when they came out. Collins is the first active player, like McCall said."

“Let me hear what else he has to say,” Kurt said, waving his hand. “Please hit play, Blaine.”

***

“This is a country in which gay men and women are now allowed to serve in our military. As environments go, you might think that the military would be among the least accepting. But there have been numerous examples of same-sex couples being reunited as one member of the couple returns from active duty, and for the most part the reactions have been just as heartwarming as the reactions to any other soldier’s homecoming, regardless of orientation. As an American, that makes me proud.

“And I am proud to live in a state where same-sex couples are granted the same rights as straight couples.” Casey paused. This was the part he hadn’t talked to Dan about, and he had no idea what his reaction was going to be, to say nothing of the reaction from the people in the booth. The only person he’d said anything to was Isaac, mostly because he didn’t want the Managing Editor to face getting chewed out by the network’s owner without warning.

“At nearly every sporting event, we call our country the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave. But this camouflages the fact that there are many here in the United States who fear for their lives daily, who fear the repercussions of freely living their lives the way that they are, as the people who they are. This week, one man stood up and said, ‘This is who I am. I refuse to hide anymore.’

Casey looked straight ahead. “And that is a statement that should be both lauded and followed.”

In his earpiece, Casey could hear Dana in the control booth take a sharp breath.

***

“Pause.” Kurt said, again flapping his hand at Blaine as he moved to sit on the couch between Blaine and the arm of his dad’s easy chair. Kurt turned to Blaine. “Remind me who this guy is again?”

“That’s Casey McCall. He and Dan Rydell -- the other guy at the anchor desk -- have been the hosts of this show for as long as I can remember.”

“Twelve, fifteen years, something like that,” Burt said. “They’ve weathered all sorts of shenanigans, both rumored off the air and seen on the air.”

“There’s always been rumors about the two of them,” Blaine said. “That there was something between them, that they were more than on-air partners. But...”

“Yeah,” Kurt said. He could guess what Blaine had left unsaid. He knew too well how hostile athletes could be.

***  
Casey was rambling; he knew he was rambling. This next part he’d deliberately left off the Tele-Prompter, mostly because he hadn’t wanted to show it to Danny in case he’d try to talk him out of doing what he was about to do. He stopped talking, looking quickly down at his printed script and the notes he’d scribbled on it.

As he paused, Casey glanced over at Dan to gauge his reaction. Were the camera to pan to him -- though it was highly unlikely it would -- Dan would appear perfectly calm, listening intently to Casey. But Casey could see that under the anchor desk Dan was drumming his fingers on his knee, a nervous tic that was as familiar to Casey as his own. Danny clearly had figured out that Casey was going somewhere with this line of thought.

***  
In Lima, Kurt stared at the screen, eyes narrowing. Was this guy about to...

“Hang on, is he saying...” Burt started to say.

“Shh, Dad!” Kurt said, before adding an apologetic “Sorry.” He scooched forward to the edge of the sofa cushion, as if sitting closer would reveal more information faster, sitting with his hands tucked under his chin and his elbows on his knees.

***

“We in sports journalism are as guilty of perpetuating the culture of silence as the athletes involved. I am not at all advocating outing people against their will. But our business should foster an environment in which anyone in the field of athletics can feel comfortable saying, ‘This is who I am; this is who I want to show the world.’”

Casey took a deep breath and looked directly at the camera. “This is who I am.”

Casey had almost argued himself out of the repetition of “This is who I am,” but in that internal argument he had seen the truth and power of that statement for himself, and realized just how necessary a refrain it was.

“My name is Casey McCall, and I am gay. This is who I am. Unlike some, I have had the luxury of not having to be in the closet; my friends and family have known about my sexuality for as long as I have. My partner and I go out together and do not hide our relationship, just as I could when I was dating and then married to a woman.”

Casey could feel Dan’s drumming getting faster. But there was still more he needed to say.

“But I bought into the silence. I have not been out with my romantic partner at public events, not because I am ashamed of him or of our relationship, but because I want to keep my private life private. And for *that* I am truly sorry. Perhaps if I -- if we -- had been more open about our relationship in public, others in our extended industry would be as open.”

***  
Now Blaine and Burt were just as riveted as Kurt had been just a few moments before.

“Well, now,” Burt said, fingering the rainbow pin he still wore. “This should prove interesting.”

“Interesting, yes. Dangerous, possibly,” Kurt said. “It is New York, but even New York isn’t perfect.”

“It’s better than here,” Blaine said quietly.

***

“So Jason Collins, if you are watching tonight, I want to thank you for being brave enough to stand up and be yourself and for inspiring others to do the same. Dan?”

Casey mentally patted himself on the back. He’d gotten through what he’d wanted to say and completed the toss to Danny. Now Danny just had to close and they’d be done.

“Thanks, Casey. I’d like to take this opportunity to echo what Casey said and add something of my own. My name is Dan Rydell, and I’m gay.”

Wait, what? That wasn’t in the script. Casey started shuffling papers to make sure he hadn’t missed anything and then stared at the TelePrompter. All it displayed was the phrase “Dan’s Closing Message.”

Danny was still speaking. “Casey was very kind not to out his partner. But tonight I wanted to say that I am not only Casey’s partner on air, I’m his partner off air. And, if he’ll have me, I’d like to be his partner in life.”

Wait, _what_!?

Casey swung his chair so that he could stare at Dan.

***

Kurt, Blaine, and Burt were all transfixed now. As Finn walked in from the kitchen saying, “Has anyone seen my...” he was immediately shushed by all three men on the sofa.

“What’s going on?” he asked.

“Shhh! On-air same-sex marriage proposal, I think,” Blaine stage-whispered.

Finn came over to perch on the opposite edge of the sofa from where Kurt was.

***

Casey barely heard Dan’s words over the pounding of his heart in his ears.

“If I were to get down on one knee here, all you’d see out in the television audience is the top of my head. So I will save that for another time. Right now, though, I need to ask. Casey McCall, will you be my husband?”

There was dead silence in the studio and in Casey’s earpiece as everyone waited for his answer. Hang on... he was supposed to say something here.

***

“Or,” Finn said, “it could be the first on-air same-sex marriage proposal _rejection_.”

“Shhh!” the other three on the sofa hissed at him.

“What’s to hear? They’re just staring at each other.”

Note to self, Blaine thought, When it comes to proposing, don’t do it in public. He thought about the conversation he’d had with Burt earlier that day in the auditorium. He was going to propose to Kurt, though he hadn’t figured out when. He was confident that he would recognize the right time when it came. But he was sure it wouldn’t be as public as this proposal was. Well, nothing he did was as public as national television, but the awkwardness of this moment wasn’t something he’d care to experience personally, even on stage at Regionals, for example.

That would probably disqualify New Directions from winning Regionals anyway, and he wouldn’t do that after they fought so hard to get there.

His attention returned to the TV, as the silence stretched on.

***  
Casey knew it couldn’t have been more than two seconds since Dan’s question, but two seconds was an _eternity_ in live television and probably felt just as long for someone waiting for the answer to a marriage proposal. If he was being honest with himself, he barely remembered asking Lisa to marry him, nor did he remember her answering the question (though she had definitely said yes).

“Casey?” The voice in his ear -- he thought it was Dana, but it could’ve been Natalie; it was whispered, which made no sense, but that made discerning whose voice it was that much harder.

“Well, now,” he started finally, if for no other reason than to fill the dead air. “This is not where I anticipated this going at all.” He finally looked over at Dan for the first time since the question was asked. Dan was still mostly in show mode, but Casey could see the panic in his eyes. He gave Dan a small smile, one he hoped wouldn’t show too much on TV but that would be at least vaguely reassuring. “Just because something is unanticipated, though, doesn’t mean it’s unwanted.”

Everyone must have been huddled around Dana, because Casey heard the collective gasp from the control room, even though it was clearly only Dana’s headset that was still live in his ear. He reached into the drawer on his side of the anchor desk that held his stash of pencils, a small notepad, and other random things he might potentially need during a broadcast and pulled out a small jeweler’s box. It amused him that he had been correct when he stashed the box there that it was one drawer that he figured Dan was unlikely to try to raid. He put it on the desk and slid it toward Dan. “Let this serve as my answer.”

Dan reached out and took the box, opening it and pulling out the ring inside. And _there_. As Dan brought the ring up to eye level (and, thus, camera-view level) Dan’s show face was gone, replaced by a look that Casey could only think of as “gobsmacked.” Casey was oddly pleased with himself for breaking Dan’s on-air composure but thanked whatever Powers that Be that watched over sports anchors that the show was nearly over.

And as he was completing that thought, into the studio walked Casey’s favorite power-that-was, Isaac Jaffe, grinning ear to ear but making the “wrap it up” gesture.

“For my partner, Dan Rydell, I’m Casey McCall. You’ve been watching Sports Night on CSC. We’ll be back tomorrow night with what I guarantee will be a less dramatic show.” Casey heard the closing music start up and saw the closing graphics on the monitor. He pulled his earpiece out and walked over to Dan’s chair, where Dan was still looking a bit shocky. Wordlessly, he reached out, put his hands on Dan’s shoulders, and turned the chair away from the anchor desk. Dan rose from the chair, still zombie-like, and Casey wrapped his arms around Dan’s waist.

“I love you, you idiot,” he whispered in Dan’s ear while everyone from the control room emptied into the studio and swarmed around them. “Of course yes. Of course.”

“You’re the idiot,” Dan whispered back. “And I will love you forever and always.”

“That’s redundant. And doesn’t come close to approaching the gravitas of ‘forevermore.’” Casey couldn’t help needling Dan.

“Yes. Yes, it is.” Dan tightened his arms around Casey as their friends swarmed them with congratulations.

***

Well, now, Blaine thought in an echo of Burt from earlier, watching Kurt staring dumbly at the end credits of “Sports Night.” He tried to break the silence. “So, that happened.”

“Don’t even think about it, Anderson,” Burt said. Blaine thanked whatever higher powers watched over boys in love that Kurt was still too distracted by what they’d just witnessed to catch his father’s comment and shot Burt as dirty a look as he could and still hold to the manners that had been drilled into him his whole life.

“Uh...did you say something, Dad?” Kurt asked, shaking his head as if to clear it.

“Nothing to worry about, bud,” Burt answered, and Blaine relaxed into his seat again. “Just talking to Blaine.”

“I... I need to get a glass of water. Anyone want anything?” Kurt asked, pushing himself up off the sofa.

“I’ve got everything I need,” Blaine said, and then mentally kicked himself. Cheesy much? he thought. “I’m good.”

He had a lot to think about. Not twelve hours ago he had talked to Kurt at the Lima Bean about the passing of marriage equality in New York, and now here he was, watching it play out in front of him on live television.

Maybe Burt was right. Maybe it was too soon. But maybe not. Maybe the lesson he should take from Jason Collins was that someone had to make the first move, be the trail blazer. And why shouldn’t it be him?

He’d talk to Sam about it. _But not right now_ , he thought as Kurt came back with a glass of water and a bowl of chips and sat down slightly closer to Blaine than he had been before. Right now, he had other things to think about.

END


End file.
